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ICRAITRRU60 - VALERIO DI STEFANO or
496 chapter 52
Sex education
On the average, disabled children begin to mature sexually around the same age
as non-disabled children. Girls may begin to have monthly bleeding (menstruate) at
about age 11 or 12 (or earlier or later). Boys begin to release semen at age 12, 13, or 14
(sometimes earlier or later). Often these new bodily functions take the child by surprise,
and may fill the child with confusion or even guilt unless he or she is informed about their
naturalness and purpose.
Because disabled children often do not have the same opportunity to mix with other
children in an unsupervised way, they can miss out on one of the most common forms of
sex education: children’s games, jokes, stories, songs, and private discussions. Therefore,
older persons should make a special point to share basic ‘facts of life’ with these children
in a relaxed, trustful way, inviting questions and answering them honestly.
Equally important, of course, is to make arrangements for disabled children to mix
with, play with, and join in the secrets of other children.
The need to accept a range of social relationships
Disabled persons have as much right to sexual relationships as non-disabled persons.
But opportunities for close relationships may not arise as often or as easily for disabled
persons as for non-disabled persons. Many of the ways that young men and women
traditionally meet may not be open.
It is therefore not surprising that some disabled people enter into love relationships
that are less traditionally accepted—sometimes 2 members of the same sex, or 2
persons from different castes, races, social levels, or other social groups between which
relationships are not locally approved.
Before condemning such a relationship, it is important to consider what benefit
or harm it is providing for each of the partners. If both partners have entered the
relationship willingly and seem happier and more whole because of it, those concerned
should perhaps be supportive—even if the relationship is not socially approved. This
should be the case whether or not the persons are disabled.
Many groups and organizations of disabled persons are outspoken in defending the
rights of persons to live in ways that are different from the norm, as long as no one is
being forced or hurt. They know from personal experience that society is often cruel and
unfair in its treatment of those who happen to be ‘different’. So they try to take the lead
in the re-education of the community toward a more flexible and accepting attitude with
regard to human variation.
On the other hand, disabled children or young people are sometimes in a position
where they can more easily be taken advantage of or abused. The very loneliness of
some disabled young people or the innocence of the mentally slow child often makes
them easy targets for abuse. Necessary precautions need to be taken.
What is important when 2 people live together or have a sexual relationship is not who
they are, but that they truly care for and respect each other.
Disabled village Children
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